If my Mother was still alive, she would be turning 61 today.
As with every other year for the last 13, I take this day to honor her. I laugh and share memories of her (now with Mini). I listen to music that brings a smile to my face and sometimes, a tear to my eye. She would probably roll her eyes at me given the amount of emphasis I and my siblings put on this day, to be honest.
I wonder what she would be like as a Grandma. I know her and Mini would absolutely adore each other. There’s no doubt in my mind about that. She made a tremendous sacrifice putting two children up for adoption. I look at Mini and can’t imagine being in a situation where I would have to part with her. I can’t fathom my life without her. The thought of someone else raising her drives me insane.
I don’t think I ever really gave my Mother enough credit for that. I do remember telling her I wasn’t mad at her for it. I understood why she did it. It wasn’t a lie. The difference is now, as the Mother of a beautiful little girl who is around the ages my sister and I were at the time, I can truly begin to grasp what she went through. It must have been hell for her emotionally and mentally..
After everything my Mother went through, I am amazed she kept her sense of humor all the way until the end. She couldn’t say much, but you better believe what came out of her mouth was going to be funny. I thought after 13 years, this might get easier. I was wrong and I hope she helps give me the strength to get through this day..
Love and Miss you, Mother.
Happy Birthday in Heaven!