I’m Confused.. When IS It A Good Time to Shut A Man Down?

Warning: Incoming Rant!

So, I’m really confused about this.

Confused and aggravated, quite frankly.

I’m married. No, it’s not all over my social media, but I am. It doesn’t matter if we are happy or not, I’m not looking for anyone and it’s not your place to assume otherwise.

I didn’t realize I had to have a billboard in the back of my posts that say “MARRIED!” or “NOT LOOKING!”

Scenario 1:

I agreed with what a guy wrote on a post. He immediately “slid into my DMs”, calling me sexy and said he wanted to get to know me. I didn’t see his message for about an hour or so, but I said if he agreed not to call me any pet names and understand that I was not going to hook up with him, we could debate about sports. So we did. It came up that I was married. He got mad and asked why I would talk to someone else when I already had a man. Umm.. why would you assume I’m single?

Scenario 2:

I was having a conversation in a public forum. Guy said something to me. It was something my husband tells me all the time, so I responded with “Haha! My husband literally said that to me this morning!” He then calls me conceited, saying he wasn’t hitting on me and I’m not even attractive and he just wanted to talk. He also inquired why females always assume they’re being hit on and said it wasn’t even like that.

Scenario 3:

One of my friends was on a chat app and a guy offered to ‘do her’. She shut him down with a simple “no thanks” and he called her rude. She then asked him, just to clarify: so she was rude in saying no, but he wasn’t rude for asking? His response was ‘Duh’.

The disrespect is crazy.

So, here is my question: When is a “good” time to shut someone down?

My answer: It seems there isn’t one.

Honestly, it doesn’t matter when you tell some of them you’re taken or how you say it, they will accuse you of wasting their time. Their obviously fragile little egos can’t handle it.

I know full well it’s not limited to me. One of my younger sisters is a lesbian and I’ve lost count how many times she’s confided in me that guys offer to “turn” her all the time. It’s sick.

So I pose the question to any males reading this..

In your opinion, when IS the ‘proper’ time for a woman to let you know she is not interested or available? Also, how should she do it? Should she be direct and just say it or should she sugarcoat it so your ego doesn’t bruise?